Advanced Listening in Domain Focusing
Reflecting work in the Issue Domain. The focuser intentionally stays in the issue domain and lays out the complexity of one of their issues or situations. The listener tries to enter the cognitive style, the way of thinking of the focuser. If you as the listener don’t understand something, you might ask for a clarification or you might decide that it is better not to intrude. The listener reflects the segment in the style of the focuser and with as much detail as they can without becoming a tape recorder. The listener may also experiment with summarizing and paraphrasing at certain points.
Reflecting work in the Felt Sensing Domain. The listener recognizes the entry into the FS domain. They know the “more” of the FS, that it is much more than the words. They pause before reflecting. They reflect slowly so the words help a FS form in them while the saying back is happening. They are as oriented toward the whole felt meaning as they are toward remembering the words. Their goal is to resonate with the focuser when reflecting the felt sense.
Reflecting work with Self-Empathy. In reflecting the focuser’s exploration of self-empathy, the listener is trying to have the empathy for the focuser which the focuser is trying to have for him or herself. If the focuser says, “Can I be gentle with myself in that situation with my boss and my friend?” The listener is trying to feel gentle toward the focuser as they say it back.